Love After Pain
Whether breaking up from a short lived romance or going through a divorce, it hurts. Things ultimately don’t work out how we planned and now we are left to recreate our story. We endure an unforgettable pain with a spectrum of emotions varying from sadness to anger. As you know, the healing process takes time, but you will rise up at some point and become a better, stronger individual having gone through that experience.
After working through never feeling like you can love or trust again, your days are brighter and the debilitating pain starts to diminish. Even though we seem to have made much progress, an invisible barrier was built during that heartbreak and will be the demise of your next relationship if you let it. It's hard to not be hesitant or use past experiences to block you from future successes. Most of the time, people enter a new relationship with the past still hindering them and the cycle repeats itself. However, if you ever want to truly love and be loved, you must not hold the past against your future partner.
We experience these loses as learning opportunities to create something better. If you want to start attracting true love, you must work through the following steps:
1. Fully Respect & Love Yourself. Self-love is imperative and if you happen to be struggling in this area, you need to focus on yourself before getting involved with anyone else. Your strengths and your flaws all add up to the exceptional individual that makes you, YOU! Someone who emits positivity and a captivating energy is an individual who has figured out in order to spread love, you must honor, treasure, and love yourself.
2.Start Setting Healthy Boundaries. You know what you value in a relationship and what you will and will not allow. If monogamy is a deal breaker, then why entertain people who don’t intend on being committed? Make sure you are giving your time, energy, and love to a deserving soul.
3. Let go of Expectations of Others. You’ve heard it before, but “no one owes you anything”. It seems harsh, but once you let go of expecting certain outcomes or relying on others, you’ll start to see your relationships as an added value.
After adopting these 3 simple concepts, you’ll see the caliber of people you meet has changed, and you’ll be ready for that special person that makes loving someone feel effortless. Speaking from experience, I didn't think any relationship was going to come into my life and be pure joy. Maybe the few first months is filled with butterflies, but quickly people get comfortable and the dynamic of the relationship changes. At least, that is how every single one had gone in my past. Then, the stars aligned and I met an amazing soul. Someone whose views were scarily identical to mine not to mention the overwhelming support I got to be myself and take care of me first. If I would of held on to the stigma that all men were equal and all relationships turn out the same, I wouldn't be in this thriving relationship. I adhered to the crucial steps above, and met someone who I am grateful every moment of the day that we crossed paths.